Preparing your family for the upheaval of moving

Preparing your family for the upheaval of moving

When moving house there are many issues to deal with, from costs of solicitors, agencies, mortgages, deposits and all of the other things that cost loads, you then have to worry about the process of moving in to the place, with hiring removers, vans, packing everything, spending more money on all of that, and even when you have arrived there will be a few days or weeks where things are not settled and your life still feels a bit on edge as you try to make the house in to a home. The likelihood is that you see this process as an important step in your life, and as the older people in the family, it is you who have taken the decision to go about uprooting the family and moving them to another place, and your mind will be focussed on the positives that you are planning on exploiting through the process.

Your children will not have decided to move, they will have been told that they are moving, and when they are young this can be a rather troublesome idea, as there feels like little place to turn. At a young age, a sense of a base, a home, somewhere that is completely safe is important, so having that taken away for some unknown other can be really difficult. You need to manage the move in a way that reduces the difficulties that your children feel in getting over the upheaval.

There are a few ways in which to ensure that your kids are feeling positive about the move. You must try to include them in decision making and planning, so that they feel like the decisions are being made with them, rather than for them. Simply asking your child whether they would like something positive that could come from the move could be enough, and pretending that they are making serious decisions is not difficult, but will help a lot. Including your kids on trips to see the new place will mean that they can see their new room and you can fill their heads with excitement at how the rooms will all look, which should mean that they are not considering the negatives of the process. These negatives are what makes the process seem like it is an attack on what they know, so as much as you can get the kids to feel like they are moving with you towards more fun and a better future, the better.

Spending time as a family during the stages of the move where things may be feeling a little more shaky is also extremely important. When your house is full of boxes, and the children don’t know where their toys are, and everything seems a little too chaotic to relax, you should retain the feeling of being as one as a family, otherwise younger kids will associate the move with a time when they felt lonely or neglected. This is obviously a terrible thing as the new place will be seen in different light, that is if the new house is not enough of a distraction to shake such feelings, and the negative impacts could lat a lot longer than the move itself. There is no accusation here, just reminders that your kids will be very confused at the idea of moving away from a place they feel comfortable in, and will no doubt want to stay, so alleviating the stress induced by moving away is a great way to make them feel more comfortable with the process.


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